Or learned?
Or done?
Many of these regrets can distract us from the good stuff we could be doing now. If you feel bogged down by all the unfinished business in your life, you're not alone. Gail Blanke is a personal and executive coach who writes about how the unfinished business in our past worms its way into the present and makes us feel overwhelmed, inadequate and anxious. Regrets distract us from our current goals and drain our energy.
She suggests taking 'inventory' of your 'incompletions:'
- Things I want to start but haven't started.
- Things I want to change buy haven't changed.
- Things I want to stop buy haven't stopped.
- Things I started but haven't finished.
- Things I want to do but haven't done.
etc, etc...you get the idea.
Now brace yourself. This is where the rubber meets the road. Go back to your list of imcompletions, and in the margin assign a completion date. N, is for now-which means right now--as in pick up the phone. L is for later, but also add a date. C, is for complete. This is a wonderful category because there are things you can declare 'complete' right this minute! YIPPEE! And finally, NTL, stands for "not in this lifetime." This one might include for me: 'learn to belly dance' or 'become a contestant on Survivor.'
Blanke encourages women to finish old business and move on so that new possibilities for completion will be opened. In her book, In My Wildest Dreams, she explains this three-step program of her decision making process.
So, start making those list and crossing things off. Now you're in charge of your list...not the other way around.
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