Day 52

April 24, 2008

I have been reading the story of Moses and the burning bush. Moses ran into the desert to escape. His attention was attracted to a burning bush and realized the bush did not burn up. What was that all about?

When Moses stopped running and really listened, he realized he was in the presence of God. And God had a message for him. At this moment, he becomes profoundly aware of something beyond his own personal trials and tribulations. "By taking the time to pay attention to what appeared to be ordinary, he discovered the extraordinary,"
Ilene Segalove.

Instead of running like Moses, I have become somewhat of a hermit. Keeping to myself, rarely going out to shop or meet others to chat. I know that I will one day reopen the doors and have friends over to dinner and such. But I am still observing this piece of time inside of myself. I must admit, I have become more sensitive to the nuances of daily life.

Cope, manage, ascertain, establish...

As if my life were a play or drama or a novel, a beginning, middle, and end are beginning to emerge. Their definable shapes are a part of the healing that enables me to calculate today as Day 52.

I have contemplated many questions over the past several months.
  • Could I have experienced this 'liminal space' more gracefully?
  • Have I been lazy in my intentions to grow and therefore become satisfied with the status quo of a life of mediocrity?
I have also had several surreal moments. Incidents that were bizarre, weirdly unfamiliar, distorted, and disturbing. Many surreal conversations, experiences, and moments have occurred.

In all these things, I decided this morning that I am better. Stronger. My rhythm of life had momentarily entered a 'desert' place. Just like Moses, I was asked to wait, and listen. Extricate myself from daily life and pay attention to God's call on my heart.

I am onto something bigger and more meaningful...it's right around the corner.

No comments:

Post a Comment